Florida Trust & Probate Attorneys Blog
Keeping Peace in The Family: 5 Common Pitfalls
By Attorney Phil Rarick, Weston Estate Planning Attorney
As an estate planning attorney, I sometimes witness stressful family fights that break out upon the death of a father or mother or husband and wife. On some occasions, it’s outright family warfare! What is painful is that the family was functioning quite well before the passing of their family member. Here are five common pitfalls to avoid:
1. No Plan For The Inevitabilities of Life
Over 67% of Americans do not have an estate plan. Over 87% of Americans will suffer a mental disability prior to death. 100% of Americans will eventually die and leave this earth for a better place. These three basic statistics should make anyone pause. Failure to plan for these existential human events is simply ignoring the realities of life. The absence of clear, legally binding instructions and plans for how family assets should be held or distributed is an invitation to costly litigation. Some persons have the attitude, “Well, I won’t be here; what do I care.” This attitude is thankfully rare, but it is almost always in direct contradiction of the father or mother’s values to provide the best future for their children – or grandchildren.
2. Outdated Estate Plans
Life is dynamic, and changes such as marriage, divorce, or the birth of children necessitate updates to your estate documents. Failure to revise your will or trust to reflect these changes can lead to confusion and disputes among heirs. Regularly reviewing and updating your estate plan ensures it accurately reflects your current wishes and family structure, minimizing potential conflicts. When was the last time you reviewed your trust or will? Apply the 3-year rule: if it has been more than 3 years since you reviewed your trust and/or will plan with your estate planning attorney it is time to give your attorney a call.
3. Trying to Do It Yourself
While it might be tempting to draft your own will or trust to save on legal fees, this approach almost always causes more costs than it saves. It is an invitation to legal challenge. Complex laws control the validity and interpretation of trusts and wills. A good trust must be written with clarity and flexibility for the uncertain future. This will sound self-serving coming from a Florida trust attorney – but you need an experienced Florida trust attorney to draft your estate planning instruments that will withstand legal challenges.
4. Thinking Verbal Instructions Are Legally Binding
Under Florida law (and in every state of the Union) verbal promises or informal agreements regarding the distribution of your assets are not legally binding. Telling your daughter you want her to have your diamond ring has no legal authority. Advise your trust attorney that you want this wish included in your estate plan.
5. No Plan for the Loss of the Family Matriarch or Patriarch
Family warfare can be especially stressful upon the death of the family matriarch or patriarch who, during life, kept the peace in the family and helped resolve family disputes. When this parent passes away, unresolved issues related to who gets what and when can lead to family disputes. The answer: establishing a clear and comprehensive trust with detailed, legally binding instructions that will control and guide the family after death. Having a peaceful, grateful, and cohesive family is a great legacy to leave – and most would say far more lasting than a purely monetary legacy.
Conclusion
The above comments reflect over 30 years of experience as a trust attorney and more years as a husband and father of three adult children and two grandsons. We are here to help you avoid these pitfalls of life and have peace of mind for you and your family with forward-looking estate planning.